My name is Julia, and I am one of the sisters, and new co-owner here at SOURCE. We are so grateful that you are here, and we hope God can use this blog to bless you.
If you would have met me a few years ago, I was quite a different person. I would have said I was a Christian, but a skeptic at best and was living a life that did not reflect Christ in any way. One thing I was very adamant about was that I did not want to get married or have children. I was very career-driven and found my worth in my success. Having had painful relationships in the past and being very financially independent, I had no desire to be vulnerable or “sign my life away” to someone who was “just going to hurt me”. Also being obsessed with fitness and my body image, I had no desire to go through pregnancy and childbirth just to lose the body I worked so hard to obtain. Not to mention having to put my social life and career aspirations aside. But here I am, chuckling as I write this, just a few short years later having had significant convictions from the Holy Spirit, married with a three-month old. My heart has been changed in so many ways, and I cannot begin to express my overwhelming gratitude for the Lord and His kindness to me. He has taught me so much and I have never felt so filled with joy, love, and contentment.
My main focus in this short blog is to address the common Christian mindset behind childbearing and childrearing we see today that I have personally wrestled with. Christians are being influenced by a society that views children as an “experience” or an “accessory” in our lives, rather than a natural purpose/consequence of marriage as well as a mission and duty to glorify God. I subscribed to the former mindset, and I continue to grapple with the reality that having children irrevocably does change your life forever. But I am constantly encouraged by the verse Psalm 127: 3-5:
“Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.”
Understanding that women have been given one of the greatest responsibilities of bringing eternal beings into this world can be an overwhelming yet glorious truth. Although it is not an easy task, it is arguably one of the most rewarding vocations God has gifted us with. In a culture which prioritizes work and careers over children and motherhood, I am yet reminded again by the beautiful truths of God’s word, specifically in 1 John 2:15-17:
“Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the father is not in him. For all that is in the world–the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride of life– is not from the Father but is from the world. And the world is passing away along with its desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever.”
Verse 17 makes it clear that the things of this world: money, fortune, careers, possessions, etc. are all passing away. My hope is to encourage whoever may be reading this to challenge yourself in being eternally minded. Our lives here on this earth are so short yet I will be the first to admit, we can be so easily distracted by the things of this world. James 4:14 says, “yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes.”
Being able to contribute to the expansion of God’s kingdom in raising children up in his name is one of the greatest blessings! One of my favorite authors, Rachel Jankovic, wrote the following in a blog post, “Motherhood is not a hobby; it is a calling. You do not collect children because you find them cuter than stamps. It is not something to do if you can squeeze the time in. It is what God gave you time for. Christian mothers carry their children in hostile territory. When you are in public with them, you are standing with, and defending, the objects of cultural dislike. You are publicly testifying that you value what God values, and that you refuse to value what the world values. You stand with the defenseless and in front of the needy. You represent everything that our culture hates, because you represent laying down your life for another- and laying down your life for another represents the Gospel. Our culture is simply afraid of death. Laying down your own life, in any way, is terrifying. Strangely, it is that fear that drives the abortion industry: fear that your dreams will die, that your future will die, that your freedom will die– and trying to escape that death by running into the arms of death… death to yourself is not the end of the story. We, of all people, ought to know what follows death. The Christian life is resurrection life, life that cannot be contained by death, the kind of life that is only possible when you have been to the cross and back.” [Motherhood Is a Calling | Desiring God]
As Christians, we are called to look different from the world, so my charge to any woman reading this is: how can we glorify God specifically in our attitudes about motherhood and willingness to have children? Instead of waiting for the “right” time (which tends too often be a worldly mindset), why not practice obedience right now? “Obedience” in the midst of our current circumstances, whatever they may be, is always the mission of a Christian. It is never easy, but Jesus reminds us in John 14:15, “If you love me, keep my commandments.” He doesn’t tell us to keep His commandments when it feels right, or when we have the time. He tells us simply to keep His commandments and when we do, we can know that if we trust in Him, He will provide us with the strength, courage, and resources we need.